Dalagan Park, Asir, Saudi Arabia. November 2013
The problem with expectations, the problem with people
I must remain true to my aspirations here - no hate, but disappointment and shock are OK, I guess.
SA, a Pakistani colleague, did his best to make the group of newly-arrived teachers feel welcome. We were invited to his house for dinner a few times in the first few months and met his family. His wife taught at the female campus. Even after just a few months of rather bland food in Abha, we were all happy to have South Asian food with its array of spices and flavors. His hospitality was genuine and generous. After one such weekend party, SA invited some of us to "Al Habala", a locally famous place, the next weekend. My first big journey outside of Abha, I felt excited.
I was hired by the university with four other native speakers after our Dean made a plea to the administration that he needed more "real English" speakers. The Dean traveled to Washington, DC himself to interview three of us. WBT {See: Desert Walks}, one of those four, arrived in Abha a few days after me. He also attended SA's dinner party and showed some interest in the expedition. SA invited his teenage son and TA, the brother of a colleague at the female campus. TA attended a few of the dinner parties, but I had not really spoken much to him. The time was set - Friday. SA would bring tasty food provided by his wife. We all looked forward to see this place we had heard so much about.
Expectation often ruins everything. I heard that Al Habala was a "must see" near Abha. I didn't know anything about it, except that "I really had to experience it" and that "it was incredibly beautiful". After a few months in Abha city only, I wanted to get out and see something new. SA showed up in his SUV , WBT and I piled in (we lived in the same building) , and we were off into the desert. The road there was anything but dramatic. We were headed away from the mountains and into the scrubby hills of the interior. Whatever Al Habala was, it certainly seemed well-hidden. Finally, we arrived at an unmanned park gate and breathed a sigh of relief that we weren't turned away due to "family Friday" {See: Ragadan Forest Park}. We nearly had the place to ourselves. SA parked, spread out a blanket, and set out the food under a large tree. We were in Al Habala.
"You are kidding me, right?" that went through my mind countless times.
We were definitely in a park with roads, parking, and a few structures for the public. Otherwise, my description from FB that day was as follows: It has a lot of boulders, but otherwise...not all that distinguishable from the rest of the area around it. I appreciated the quiet and lack of cars. I actually started to think that Abha was going to be a colossal bust for seeing interesting things. I arrived late August and was only in my third month. I had focused on work and getting used to day to day life. I had not done ANYTHING since arrival except work and get settled. I had not yet seen a traditional house. I had not yet even viewed the Escarpment from Abha city since I lived far from the center. Literally, this was the first place I visited in Saudi Arabia outside of the city AND I had been told it was incredible. Honestly, I thought, "God, it doesn't take much to impress Saudis if they think this place is good". Even WBT, never a man of many words, said afterward, "not a whole lot there."
We did enjoy a lovely afternoon. The guys played a bit of cricket and they got WBT to have go at batting. We ate good food. I got to know TA more - which was likely the best part of the whole outing. TA is Pashtun from the Swat Valley of Pakistan. He told me that his sister got a job teaching on the female campus, but women could not be unaccompanied in Saudi Arabia (at least back then). He joined her from Pakistan as her "guardian" with the hope of finding a job himself. TA had a business degree and spoke excellent English. Most of the time I knew him he was jobless, but finally he did find work as a cable installer. The job did not match his skill set, but it beat sitting in their apartment all day long doing nothing. TA turned out to be a true friend over my five years in Abha. I was grateful to have met him through SA.
WBT and I told everyone at work the next Sunday that Al Habala was a bust, not worth seeing. We politely told Saudis "oh yes it was nice". But really, what was all the fuss? We just didn't see how the Saudis (and others) spoke of this place so rapturously. Well, there had been a big problem:
This is Al Habala.
SA, knowing that we were new and naive, had taken us to dusty Dalagan Park which is "in the general area of Al Habala" on purpose and basically told us we visited something he knew full well we did not. In fact, it was only years later, that one of my students took me once again to Dalagan to a small, natural lake that is quite scenic. SA had not only misrepresented the entire trip, he had not even bothered to take us to the best bit of the park! AND.... Dalagan Park is filled with boulders, so it is quite famous for snakes and scorpions. Lovely to find that out AFTER we had been sitting on the grass!
What happened? Ah, subterfuge, drama, and bad expectations were my constant companions at that job. The large contingent of South Asians let a rumor spread amongst themselves that they were to be replaced by English native speakers. The five of us had arrived into a hornets' nest of rumor and bad feeling. Leading the charge in all of this, SA, himself. He tasked himself with getting on our good side all the while trying to make sure our experience at the university and Abha was so bad that we would want to leave. Really, that is what he did - unbelievable! After a few months the full weight of it hit me - I was shocked. I even had a tête-à-tête with the Dean about it. He assured me that the South Asians were NOT in danger of losing their positions AND that we all had better watch our backs with some colleagues (although in truth, there was little anyone could do to us as the Dean had personally hired us). In the end, however, that was some dark shit.
Some good came out of it all. I got to know TA and we maintained our friendship throughout my time in Saudi Arabia. We did have a few excellent meals at SA's house before understanding what was happening and putting an end to that (much to SA's false astonishment). Because of what took place that day, I decided that any further expeditions in the Kingdom would be with Saudis only (that turned out to be wise). And, after showing Saudi friends some photos of Dalagan as Al Habala and them learning we had been duped, they took WBT and I to the REAL Al Habala which truly is a breathtaking site {See: Al Habala} which I visited many times over my five years in Abha.
Are expectations ever good? They can cause disappointment - even fear and irrational behavior.